Dear Hamilton Nolan & Gawker:

I want to thank you for your post supporting Christopher Hitchens’ claim that women aren’t funny. I also I want to apologize for not writing sooner, but between getting my bikini line waxed, shopping, trying, in vain to be funny, and dealing with PMS, I had no time– and was in no shape–to write anything. But I want to thank you for having the testosterone-drenched you know whats to say what nobody else, besides Christopher Hitchens and lots of men, will say: women comics Suck! And Christopher Hitchens Rocks! Responding to the unfunny and boring and (I know this is redundant) female-written Vanity Fair article Who Says Women Aren’t Funny, you write

The problem they [female comics] have is they often talk about things that women can relate to–relationships with men, babies, periods, shopping, love. As a man, I can’t relate to all that. That puts women comics at a distinct disadvantage when trying to win over me and my fellow men. This is obvious day, right here.

THANK YOU! I can’t STAND when Sarah Silverman talks about her babies! Oh, right she doesn’t have any, but I bet if she did she wouldn’t shut up about them. And Tina Fey, can you please stop talking about your period? I mean, I haven’t hear her talk about it, but she’s a woman and it happens once a month–I know, TMI, sorry — and when it does we’re really emotional, so I bet even if she didn’t want to talk about her period, it would be biologically impossible for her to stop herself from talking about her hormones and her feelings. So I’m sure it comes up, right?And I too wonder why “girls,” as you call us, bother getting their frilly pink panties all up in a bunch over Christopher Hitchens. I love your point that

Chris [that is SOOOO cool that you call him by his nickname!] Hitchens is a brilliant, repugnant slob of a man, and any argument he makes should be taken as one from a male point of view. For him to say that women aren’t funny is for him to say that they’re not funny to him, a man.

THANK YOU! That reminds me of when the PC Nazis spit up their fair trade soy organic lattes over my occasional harmless observations about black people’s inferior intelligence. See, I’m a brilliant, appealing, slob of a white person, and any argument I make should be taken as one from a white point of view. For me to say that black people aren’t that smart is for me to say that they’re not smart to me, a white person. So take a chill pill ladies… and black people.

Do you actually think women are funny? Then and support the Hysterical Festival, New York’s first female comedy festival ever.